S5E64: How to listen to what you need when you don’t know what you need
Full transcript:
Good morning, happy Thursday, and welcome to the Language Confidence Project, the daily dose of language courage for people who love languages and those who really don't but have to learn one anyway. And just a reminder, the final episode of Season 5 will be tomorrow and then we'll be back for Season 6 on Monday the 29th of April. And within that break, I am going to be working incredibly hard on a book and a YouTube channel to spread as much language courage as possible. So keep an eye out on the podcast for updates on where else you can find all the Language Confidence Project pep you need over the break.
So, one of the messages that we hear so often, including from this podcast, is “Listen to what you need. You know yourself best, and you know what to do.” And yet, one of the most common questions that I get asked when we talk about carving our own path is:
But what if you really don't know what you need? What if you know what you absolutely don't need, you know what you definitely don't want, but you have no idea how to even start finding the right next step for you?
It's a valid question and a really scary place to be if it's paired with a sense of urgency. So today I wanted to give you three possible questions to ask yourself if you really don't know what you need.
What do people like me do?
Now, this question is going to require some real discipline not to dive straight into self comparison with random but algorithm friendly people who are roughly the same age or demographic as you. You are going to need to be really specific with your searches, but it might give you some fantastic ideas that you'd never have thought of just watching or reading the most popular language channels. So questions might look like,
How do stay at home mums learn a language?
How do introverts practice speaking?
How do perfectionists practice speaking?
How do people with ADHD revise vocabulary?
How do kinesthetic learners practice reading? Or how do busy people read in their language?
And there will be plenty of blogs, social media posts, stories, and ideas about how other people have found ways to work with their own brains, their own personalities, and their own circumstances.
What seems interesting right now?
Because when you have no idea what to do next, that is the time to let curiosity take the reins. It doesn't need to be the start of a massive project or a whole new module. And depending on your circumstances and what you're feeling lost with, it doesn't even need to be something big and broad like a formal topic to study. It might be a single random question like, “what do German people most commonly name their dogs?” Or thoughts like, “otters are just so cute!”. And then you go and find videos for just a few minutes about that thing in your new language, just to see where the curiosity takes you. Maybe you resolve to ask questions about it on social media or to research it for a bit. It's just about bringing that creativity and that playfulness back in so that the panic kind of settles a bit and you've You've got the space to start problem solving again and to enjoy spending time with your language again.
What seems just a tiny bit better than where I am right now?
And this doesn't need to be a dramatic change. It doesn't need to be a whole load of newness. It's just that one step in any direction where a problem that you're currently facing is just slightly better. Maybe things are slightly more interesting, slightly less difficult, they take slightly less time. It's just these tiny adjustments by degree to see if that will set you on a path that you like better.
It's normal, so normal, to have phases of our journey where we feel like we've hit a bit of a plateau or the fog descends and we have no idea where we're heading next. You know, those phases, some of them pass really quickly and some of them, well, they do hang around for a bit. But I promise you, you won't feel this confused forever. Just head in the direction that feels one degree warmer, one tiny bit more interesting, or one tiny bit better in any possible way. You don't need to know what happens after that step, just get to that step first. Anything else, you can fix later.
And a super quick reminder that I have restarted the 100 Conversations Project that I did last year and I enjoyed it so much that I decided to bring it back. The idea is that I'm inviting listeners of the podcast to book a 30 minute call with me just so we can meet each other, get to know each other, chat about how your language journey is going and what carving your own path means to you. And I would love to invite you to be part of this, whether you're a new listener, or we spoke last year and you would love to update me.
Just as before, these calls are not going to be used for content. They're not going to be recorded and there won't be any sales pitches. It's just a chance for us to meet each other. So if you would like to book a call. There is a link in the show notes for this podcast, and you could also go to the website www.languageconfidenceproject.com, or to my Instagram bio at @teawithemily, where you will also find every episode on a post it, so a quick one or two line summary of each episode, in case you want to stick it on your wall. So have a lovely day and I will see you tomorrow for the final episode of the season.